Kakak brought back her report card last Friday with full compilation of her Ujian Fasa 1 Tahun 2/2009. Like I mentioned before, to me, she's not racing with other people (yet) but more within herself.
To be frank, I was frustrated on how things turned out to be. Especially with myself. I was not consistent, I was not sensitive enough to her schooling needs (ada homework? if she doesn't, then that was it lah). Her overall score dropped from 80%++ to 70%++ from half-year to year-end. Her placement dropped as well. So did my intergrity as a mother.
Tak guna meratap, then tak buat apa-apa kan.
Came year 2009, I have my resolution. I want to be more sensitive, encouraging, supportive where her education is concerned. I may not be the best of a mother, but I am trying to beat the odds to help us out. Even that would mean putting my interest at the lowest in my 'priority' list. It's hard at times, to ensure she does her work correctly whilst making her understand the whole concept, with our dinner on the stove. And that means, I'm hanging my laundry way past midnight at our backyard.
(The other day, she came back crying because she couldn't do her homework. To me, that was among the sign that she has started to take schooling seriously. Despite her tears, I was thankful).
So far, to an extend, we managed to beat the odds. With a little extra work. A little extra preserverance. A little extra patience and passion. A little encouragement. A little words of supports and compliments. We may not be the best of people, but we are better. We still have a long way to go tho.
So, last Friday, she came back with her report card that made Tebby brimmed with pride when he showed me. Her overall percentage improved. So did her placement.
I am not saying I'm the best'est mother in the world. I am trying to be, at least in my children's world. It's a process. A long painful process. But people say, the harder we work for something, the more we appreciate it. It does, doesn't it?
pst.. I bought her a small token. As a reward for her hardwork and success. A simple cheap watch to light up a little girl's world.